I re-fell in love with my boyfriend this weekend

Things haven’t been going well for us. We’ve had so many fights and rough patches (especially over the past few months) that we never seemed to get over. We told each other we’d change and both of us were stuck at constants. We had no idea how difficult things would be and I was literally ready to drop it and walk. I couldn’t stand being unhappy and feeling unappreciated. I was so frustrated with our relationship’s volatility and unpredictability. I was just exhausted from everything. 

After having one of our biggest and most emotional fights this weekend, we put basically everything to the test. I was ready to walk out the door and he wouldn’t let me leave. I kept telling him I was done and didn’t want anything anymore and that the only reason I was staying as long as I did was because I worked so hard to be with him. And I told him that we didn’t work anymore and that we were past the point of trying. But he made me understand that there is no past a point of trying…it’s giving up.

I’ve never seen him cry…well, not like that at least. I didn’t think that how I was living my life was hurting him that much. The long distance seriously puts so much pressure on both of us…and I was selfish thinking it was just me being affected by it. 

I stubbornly left his house and drove off. I didn’t even know where I was driving to. I kept driving and my mind was racing. Fifteen minutes alone with my thoughts and I couldn’t help but turn around. What was I doing? I’m about to walk away from the best and most important person in my life. I don’t know where I’d be without him or who I’d be without him. He is everything I’ve ever wanted in someone since I met him in seventh grade. When I got back to his house, looking at him reminded me of all the reasons why I love and have always loved him and why it would never work with anyone else but him. And the entire weekend from that point on just made me fall in love all over again. 

Happy anniversary, babe. I love you.

@3 months ago with 1 note